Well there ain’t no time to wonder why
Whoopee! we’re all gonna die
– from “I Feel Like I’m Fixin’ to Die Rag,” by Country Joe and the Fish (Joe Allen McDonald, 1968)
Hey there, you in the MAGA hat, are you willing to die for your Dear Leader’s re-election? He wants you to. After all, you’re a soldier now, and when your leader sends you into battle to face possible injury or death, you must go. Storm the beaches in Florida, Texas and California! Invade the bars and restaurants! Plant your flag in hair salons and gyms! The “Wartime President” summons you to action.
“In recent days, he’s begun describing citizens as ‘warriors’ in the battle against the pandemic,” says the Los Angeles Times about the President, “and suggested some of those fighters might have to die if that will help boost the economy.” “Will some people be affected badly?” he asked rhetorically during a recent visit to Arizona. “Yes. But we have to get our country open, and we have to get it open soon.”
It’s not just the economy. As Nate Silver of FiveThirtyEight notes, “the strong likelihood of a potentially very deep recession triggered by coronavirus puts Trump’s reelection chances in jeopardy.” Donald Trump based his reelection on a strong economy because he doesn’t have anything else to run on. The rest of his so-called policies are either dim-witted or divisive, but everybody loves a booming economy. He has to restart the economy to have a remote chance at reelection – and many will die for his political benefit. He thinks his followers will fall for it. Maybe Darwin Award finalists will.
Some of the MAGA-heads already think of themselves as soldiers. We’ve seen their cosplay in Michigan, where they stormed the capitol, demanding recission of the Governor’s stay-at-home order, screaming at what they say is “tyranny.” They wore angry red MAGA hats and phony camouflage while some brandished Confederate battle flags and “Don’t Tread on Me” banners. Most were well-fed white guys who clutched and stroked their weapons like a favorite body part.
But they weren’t wearing masks. Soldiers for Trump don’t wear masks. Face masks are for sissies and liberals – to them, the same thing. “On the right, where the mask is often seen as the symbol of a purported overreaction to the coronavirus,” write Ryan Lizza and Daniel Lippman in Politico, “mask promotion is a target of ridicule.” They note that face masks have been “turned into a token of tribal affiliation.”
COVID-19 does not recognize tribal affiliation. It dines on lungs and conservative lungs are just as tasty as liberal lungs. An easy way to block lung-to-lung transmission is to wear a mask to arrest infected droplets before they are coughed or exhaled into somebody else’s air. Many unmasked people don’t have symptoms and don’t think they have the coronavirus, so why use a mask? Here is why: if you are asymptomatic and shedding the virus, you are the virus.
Trump is all about keeping score and settling scores, so he constantly talks about numbers. He wants good numbers. High unemployment: bad number. Massive business failures: bad number. Substantial COVID-19 casualties: bad number. Trump is prematurely reopening the country to get rid of the first two. That will increase the third bad number, so he moves the goalposts to make it look not as bad. In February he said COVID-19 “within a couple of days is going to be down to close to zero, that’s a pretty good job we’ve done.” On March 29th he said a death toll in the range of 100,000 to 200,000 people would mean he had “done a very good job.” That’s because they will die for a worthy cause: his reelection. Meanwhile, he’s reluctant to pursue widespread testing because that could make his numbers look bad.
It’s not unprecedented to sacrifice human lives for economic reasons. Why are there so few protected railroad crossings? Because they’re expensive. Why are railroad tracks not fenced in within most municipal boundaries? Because it’s expensive. One of my law clients was a railroad engineer who was bringing a train into central Tucson when a small girl, probably 4 or 5 years old, wandered out of her yard and onto the tracks, where she sat, blissfully unaware of the metal giant bearing down on her. My client desperately hit the brakes. But trains don’t stop on a dime; the little girl was killed. He wondered aloud if he could have saved her had he climbed out of the cab and worked his way to the front of the train to knock her out of the way. I said he would have been killed had he tried. He said he’d have been okay with that. Was the money saved leaving the tracks unfenced worth the cost? The railroad thought so; he didn’t.
There’s an old saying: “A Single Death is a Tragedy; a Million Deaths is a Statistic.” The little girl’s death was a tragedy to her family and my client. To the railroad, it was a line in the budget. Many industries weigh liability against profits, including railroads, coal mines, and trucking companies. For Trump, the score-keeper, two hundred thousand deaths for the sake of re-animating the economy and ensuring his reelection is an acceptable statistic, “a very good job.”
Thousands of Americans will die unnecessarily because coronavirus precautions are being relaxed prematurely at Trump’s urging. He believes voters will reward him for rescuing the economy, even at such a cost. But his recipe omits an important ingredient: humanity. That will be his undoing. He sows the wind and will reap the whirlwind – the virus-laden whirlwind.
© 2020 by Mike Tully
<<< YOU CAN READ / DOWNLOAD A PDF VERSION BY CLICKING HERE >>>
The Magic Medicine Show
Musical Intro:
♫ Did you take hydroxychloroquine today?
Bang the drum!
Did you take hydroxychloroquine today?
Bang the drum!
If you take hydroxychloroquine
Your lungs and guts will be so clean
So, take hydroxychloroquine today!
Bang the drum! ♫
ANNOUNCER: One America Network and Info Wars proudly present Dr. Donny John’s Magic Medicine Show. The place for simple answers for simple people. Are you tired of all those elitist scientists and doctors on TV? Are you sick of them telling you how to live your life? If so, this is the place for you. Dr. Donny John’s Magic Medicine Show is sponsored by the Karachi Kompounding Pharmacy. Off-label? Heck, we invented off-label! And now, the star of our show, the man who understands you better than you understand yourself, Dr. Donny John!
DDJT: Thank you, Alex. And thank you to all of our viewers and listeners. I’m Doctor Donny John Trump. Here with me today are my lovely wife, Melanie…
MELANIA: Melania.
DDJT: Melania. Also joining me is my lovely daughter, Ivanka, and my brilliant son-in-law, Jared. I have a question for everybody: Did you take hydroxychloroquine today? If not, get up right now and go take it. Take it! What do you have to lose? Hydroxychloroquine is the wonder drug we have all been waiting for. Coronavirus? No problem. Socialism? Cures that too. Elitists? They hate it. Want to annoy a liberal? Take hydroxychloroquine in front of them. Record a video and post it on our web page, “Dosing with Doctor Donny John.” How many videos have been posted, Ivanka?
IVANKA: I don’t know, Daddy.
DDJT: Doctor.
IVANKA: Doctor. I meant to say Doctor. I don’t know how many videos have been posted. I think Jared knows.
JARED: Actually, the website’s not yet operational, but there will be thousands of videos once we get it rolling. I have the best people working on it.
DDJT: Ivanka, have you taken your hydroxychloroquine today?
IVANKA: Yes, Dadd—uh, Doctor.
DDJT: Jared? Have you taken your hydroxychloroquine today?
JARED: Yes sir, Doctor Donny John. Right after breakfast.
DDJT: Melania, have you taken your hydroxychloroquine today?
MELANIA: Go to hell.
DDJT: Ha-ha, what a kidder. Alex, where can our friends order hydroxychloroquine?
ANNOUNCER: You can order hydroxychloroquine from our sponsor, the Karachi Kompounding Pharmacy. Need a prescription? No problem. We have doctors standing by 24 hours a day. All of them are specially certified to prescribe hydroxychloroquine. Orders filled quickly and shipped immediately. Just call them at 1-800-367-4648. That’s 1-800-DOSING-U. Don’t wait. Call right now. 1-800-DOSING-U.
DDJT: Thank you, Alex. We have that number on speed dial. I’ve been taking hydroxychloroquine for days now. I mean weeks. I’ve been taking it for weeks. Not only have I avoided catching COVFEFE-19, I feel better generally. Believe it or not, I’ve gotten happier since I started taking hydroxychloroquine. Frankly, I feel super. Melania, you’ve seen a difference, haven’t you?
MELANIA: Yes, Donald, you’re as happy as boiled cabbage. And did you know hydroxychloroquine has an extra special effect on the heart? You should double your dosage. You’ll not only feel super, you’ll feel super-duper. That’s a medical term.
DDJT: I know. I know a lot about medicine. People say I have an aptitude.
ANNOUNCER: Doctor Donny John, we have a caller on line 9.
DDJT: Caller, go ahead.
CALLER: Good morning, Doctor Donny John. I can’t believe I actually got through! This is like a dream, speaking directly to the Doctor God Emperor. I’m so glad God made you President.
MELANIA: The Lord works in mysterious ways.
DDJT: Shut up, Melania. Caller, do you have a question?
CALLER: Yes, sir. I know the coronavirus was created by deep state traitors and liberals and socialists and Communists and George Soros to undermine your presidency. You told us that hydroxychloroquine will cure it, and even prevent us from getting it. But can hydroxychloroquine do anything about the source? I mean, can hydroxychloroquine cure the deep state and get rid of the traitors?
DDJT: That’s a great question, caller. Yes, hydroxychloroquine will help us get rid of the deep state, Democrats, liberals, socialists and members of the lesser races. If they take it, they will get sick and die. All those people the fake news media keep telling us have gotten sick or died? They were liberals, socialists, Democrats, deep state traitors and undesirables. Hydroxychloroquine gets rid of them. So, get them to take it. That’s the beauty of hydroxychloroquine. It gets rid of undesirables, but protects my followers. Every American who loves liberty should take hydroxychloroquine every day. It’s the drug that will save the country.
CALLER: That’s a miracle! I’m going to call the Karachi Kompounding Pharmacy right now and order a case of hydroxychloroquine. I’ll take a double dose for myself and will slip it to every liberal, Communist, socialist, and deep state traitor who leaves a drink unattended. I want to drain the swamp and Make America Great Again.
DDJT: You are a true patriot.
CALLER: I love you, Doctor Donny John. I want to hug and kiss you!
DDJT: (Throws up in his mouth.) Good, good. Thanks for the call. Well, that’s all the time we have today. Until we meet again, keep the faith, drain the swamp, keep America great, and remember our slogan: Hydroxy is foxy!
ANNOUNCER: Tune in again next week for “Doctor Donny John’s Magic Medicine Show,” the answer to anything that makes you sick and/or annoyed. Brought to you by the Karachi Kompounding Pharmacy, the world’s greatest hydroxychloroquine dealer. Thank you for watching or listening and always remember: Do what Dr. Donny John tells you to do.
You can trust him. He’s a doctor.
© 2020 by Mike Tully
<<< YOU CAN READ / DOWNLOAD A PDF VERSION BY CLICKING HERE >>>