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Posts published in January 2017

The Battle of Little Big Hands

He was vain. He was known for his striking blonde hair, cinnamon scented and longer than the fashion of the day, as essential to his image as twinkle to a star. Gold braids adorned his clothing. He enjoyed success early in life, earning a promotion that made him the youngest general in the Union Army. To honor the occasion, and himself, he donned a special uniform partly because, according to History.net, “he wanted a distinctive uniform so his men could see him during combat.”  The impact was not limited to the troops who served under him. As the same website notes, “Superior officers and newspapermen could also see such striking attire, unlike any other in the army.” That was not an accident. He was one of the first media personalities in American history and was skilled in his use of the news outlets of the day.

He was arrogant and sometimes broke the rules. He violated a treaty and ventured into Native American lands when gold was discovered there, resulting in hostility on the part of the tribes and an effort to confine them to reservations. He once went absent without leave and was court-martialed twice. He failed to follow the orders of his commander and, on the second such occasion, did not live to regret it. He was an author and sought out book deals. He publicly feuded with the President, Ulysses S. Grant, and wrote magazine articles critical of Grant’s attempt to achieve peaceful relations with Native American tribes. He dreamed of becoming President and told associates his future would include the White House.

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Make America Firm Again

Is Donald Trump political Viagra? If the answer is yes, it may explain the success of the most unusual, invulnerable, and unexpected President-elect in history. Viagra sells dreams. That is why it is the most popular impotence drug in the world, despite its lack of satisfactory results. Its primary competitor, Cialis, rates much higher in customer satisfaction surveys, including those that include female partners. But compare the commercials. Cialis offers a remedy aimed at your average Jack and Jill. When Jack can’t scale the hill he takes a pill to thrill Jill and, in the blink of an eye (from Jill’s perspective) they are enjoying a post-connubial soak in paired bathtubs. Jack and Jill are average folks and could be your neighbors, except for the odd bathtub thing.

Viagra commercials are located in dreamland, not Jack-and-Jill-ville. They are set in exotic, luxurious resort locales, where tropical breezes riffle wispy nightgowns as the tide foams in the background. The women are not your average Jills. They are Super Models, fantasy creatures, who pose seductively and invite male viewers into their web of pulchritude. You never see the men in those commercials, at least not their faces. The most you see is the man from the neck down as he transports a cart of expensive designer luggage. The man’s identity is left vacant so that the viewer can inhabit it. Never mind that the advertiser’s target could never afford the resort or the woman, not to mention the luggage. When your skill set is obsolete, your values disparaged, your income jeopardized if not eliminated, and your life expectancy dropping because of despair and drug abuse, a dream may seem like salvation.

Donald Trump is the Viagra dream personified.

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